As a mother, I feel like I'm not allowed to show any emotion and must always remain calm in the face of adversity. I am told that my son feeds off my emotions, and if I get angry, so will he. I am told if I cry, my son will think the worst is happening. And of course, if I'm happy, he will laugh along with me. I am a very emotional person, and it's usually pretty obviously how I'm feeling. So I ask you, dear readers, how does such an emotionally expressive woman keep her feelings at bay? Am I seriously not entitled to get mad or cry for the next several years for the sake of my child?
As a creative person, I embrace my feelings right then and there and let my thoughts flow freely. Yet as a mom, I must think about how I react, the expression on my face, the tone of my voice, and how I handle everything that comes at me because my boy is always watching and learning from what I do. It's as if everything I've been taught to be successful as an artist hinders me from being a calm and collective mother. Not to mention, motherhood has taken most my free time to express my emotions through a creative outlet.
So what do I do now when I'm riding the emotional roller coaster of life? I feel like everyone just wants me to put on a happy face and suck it up. Well, believe me when I say I try.
Hey Keri
ReplyDeleteIt is ok to cry, rant etc. in front of your son from time to time. If he isn't exposed to that sometimes, he will be really surprised when it happens later down the line. He may not know how to deal with that when he gets older if he doesn't experience it. All you need to do is explain to him afterward why you were feeling that way, and he will be ok. Hope this makes sense. :-)
Keri, I think that you be yourself with your son. Emotions are good, but sometimes we need to explain to our kids that our anger, or our tears are not something they need to worry about. We need to tell them I'm okay and I'm sad or mad but it will be okay. But most of all as a parent no matter how good of one you are, you will look back at times and say I could have done better. Never be afraid to tell your child I'm sorry if you think you might have over reacted or maybe you directed your grumpiness toward them. Remember there is no such thing as a perfect mother, father, child etc. just give them lots of love and patience.
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